Friday, November 29, 2013

I'm not a TOTAL hater...honest. maybe I hate a couple of Canadian songs from the '80s but I'm not a complete CanadianMusicaphobe. It's a real word. If you don't believe me...look it up.

Au contraire, mes amis!! See!! I'm even bilingual... I totally love Canada!!

I enjoyed a whole whack of Canadian music when I was young..... and restless. <---- see what I just did there?? Well, you would if you a true fan of Canadian music from the '80s, like me.

My tastes were a little diverse...

Along with almost every teenage Canadian girl in the '80s, I loved Corey Hart. I had a chance to go see him in concert but my dad wouldn't let me go because a teenage boy was doing the driving and he didn't trust teenage boy drivers...weird. Anyway, the boy I was supposed to go with took another girl...Thanks for nothin' Dad!!  Goddamn, Corey Hart was so adorable.


I loved the super awesomely cheesey Platinum Blonde....but that doesn't really matter. You're welcome for the chance for an awesome air drum solo. The lead singer looks just like my next door neighbour did...but she was/is a girl.

I loved Rush. My friend and I would sneak into her brother's room and listen to all his Rush albums and discuss the lyrics...we were so deep. Yeah right.

See...I loved TONS of Canadian song in the '80s. And there's waaaaay more...


You know what I feel comin' on??

I feel a comprehensive list comin' on...don't you??

So here is:

"A Kinda Comprehensive List of Canadian Songs from the '80s That I Loved"
by: squirrel_e_girl

  • One of my Favourites: "She Ain't Pretty" by Northern Pikes. I think it's hilarious.  (this one is from  1990...but I'm sneaking it in anyway)

  • Any song by The Grapes of Wrath, but probably this one the most... Peace of Mind

  • Any song by Blue Rodeo. I'm going with "Try". These guys are still one of my very very favourite bands.  Jim Cuddy is so dreamy...sort of a Woody from Toy Story/ Wayne Gretzky combo...but sexier.

  • Who doesn't love "Safety Dance" by Men Without Hats?

  • Then there's "Heaven" by Bryan Adams. Everyone loves this song and if they don't then they have issues...big ones. Actually, the very first time I ever felt "old"was immediately after this song played on the radio and the announcer said "And that was an oldie but a goodie by Bryan Adams. Ten years ago this week, "Heaven" was released"...and I felt like someone put a (cuts like a) knife right straight from the heart of my youth...I was 23. "Heaven" was responsible for my awakening to the concept of the passage of time. This little explanatory blurb is grammatically indecent...but I'm leaving it as is.

  • I also loved anything by Spoons. They were the first band I ever saw in concert. My best friend and I took a bus all the way down to Barrie to see them. It's only 1/2 hour away...but we were 14 so it was kind of a big deal.  The keyboardist was a total babe and only now, as a mature grown up lady, can I fully appreciate the hotness of the bass player. She is even more of a total babe. My favourite song is "Arias and Symphonies" but I could only find a non-'80s version so I'm not going to showcase old people singing the songs of my youth. Instead, take a peek at "Nova Heart"'s pretty good, too. (if you really want to hear "Arias and Symphonies" click here and scoot to 19:07)

  • this one is a wee bit cheesier than the rest but I still loved it.  It's a song by Honeymoon Suite...who played in my high school's gym. These guys are the second band I saw live. The song is called "What Does it Take" and it reminds me of a boy I loved...*sigh*. BIG HAIR ALERT!!!

  • And, now for something completely different...David Wilcox. He's awesome. His songs, along with ACDC, provided the soundtrack to most Orillia high school parties back in the day. I could probably sing several of his songs word for word acapella ...THAT is how ingrained Wilcox is into my memory. I saw him, too, at a high school concert..he was a hoot. He might've even been drunker than some of the teenaged concert goers...and that's sayin' something. Although, at that particular concert, I think the vast majority of kids were on acid...present company excluded. Seriously, if you were to poll any/all people who were in attendance at that show, most would have to check the "yes" box after the " Were you on acid at the Wilcox concert at OD?".  Not me...I was just smashed...most likely on Southern Comfort and Cream Soda...yummy. Anyhow, a couple of weeks ago, my Sweetie and I had the good fortune of seeing Wilcox play live and I was wondrously surprised when he stepped on stage and started to sing. Quite frankly, I was expecting to be embarrassed for him. The man is 64 and has lived a HARD life of booze and drugs and I figured he'd be horrible...but he was the opposite of horrible. His voice was clear and crisp and his guitar playing was as sharp as ever. Super crazy impressive. Kudos to you, Mr. Wilcox. Here's "Riverboat Fantasy"...sing along with me, if you please:

  • This is another good one. "I'm an Adult Now" but The Pursuit of Happiness.

  • This song isn't one of my favourites, but this past summer, I did win two rounds of golf because I was able to name "The band and song name" on a radio contest called "The Blast from the Past". I feel it deserves an honourable mention. It's "Innocence" and it's by a band called Harlequin. Thanks for the golf, dudes.


Now...there are actually TONS more but I'm gonna quit while I'm ahead and I think I've firmly established the fact that I really DO love Canadian music of the '80s.

Now, Canadian literature....

That is definitely another story. 

A dark, dreary, depressing story. 

Don't even go there, sister.

Holy Shit!!!  Canadian authors are a morbid lot.

Although I do love Timothy Findley.

But he's a dark DARK bastard, too.

And I would FOR SURE lose my Orillian citizenship if I lumped Stephen Leacock in with everyone else... 

So, before I discover any burning bags of dog poop on my front porch...

I Heart Stephen Leacock.

And Gordon Lightfoot. (gotta cover all my bases)



Saturday, November 23, 2013

Thanks, Bruce Cockburn. I needed that.

I never... a million gajillion years

thought I'd have anything nice to say about Bruce Cockburn's music.

But, now I do.

You see, I was driving home from work today and this song came on the radio:

...and I started to COL (Chuckle Out Loud) to myself.

You see, waaaaaaaaaay back in the '80s, when this song first came out, I hated it.



Hated it.

It made me irrationally angry.

I'm talking, Teenager Irrationally Angry.

And that's pretty f**king irrationally angry.

The only thing that made me more irrationally angry than THAT song did, was THIS song :

Holy christ.

The songs are soooooooo loooooooooong and booooooooring and monotonous and stupid and repetitive and looooooooooong and boooooooooring and monotonous and stupid and repetitive.

They made me want to remove my eardrums with a pair of tweezers.

Now, I know that he's being all environmental activist-y and trying to raise awareness of a lot of shitty SHITTY things that go on in this crazy ol' world...and I do respect that.

I really do.


On top of that..

He's Canadian.


Goddamn, I hope I don't get my Canadian Card suspended for this bare-faced blasphemy. Fingers crossed.

Great job, Mr. Cockburn, fellow Canadian. I commend you on your efforts to save our beautiful planet.

...but could you please "do good" with better, less annoying songs??

Pretty please??

With a wee bit of organic stevia on top??

Back in the day, I seemed to have issues with certain Canadian songs of the '80s, because I also f**king HATED this one, by Luba:


It's stupid and super long, too.

Then there was THIS ONE, by The Parachute Club, that I think I probably hated more than the other three combined:


Anyhow, I'm a little off course.

Back to Bruce and why I'm grateful to him.

So, "If a Tree Falls"  was playing and I was chuckling, thinking back to my irrational teenage years and marveling at how violently perturbed that song made me (and if I'm completely honest, I still can't stand it) and how much those other songs bugged me, too, and I thought to my Self...

"Self, that sounds like some fun blog post fodder."

You see, what with one thing and another, I haven't felt particularly inspired and I've avoided my blog like it was someone knocking on my front door...

I've got another funny "someone knocking on my door" story ...maybe I'll write about that, too. We'll see.

And who woulda thunk that I could find inspiration in a stupid annoying long ass monotonous Bruce Cockburn song??

But I did.

And I'm writing about it.

Lucky you guys!!??


The End.

p.s. As a favour to you, I will also share the only other good thing about Bruce Cockburn, and that is this cover of "Lovers in a Dangerous Time" by The Barenaked Ladies:

You're welcome.

OH!! ok....FINE!!!!

I admit that, since becoming a grown up person, I have, on occasion, much to my teenage Self's chagrin, found myself inadvertently singing along to both the Luba song AND the Parachute Club song.


You caught me.

I still hate the Bruce Cockburn songs.

So there!!


It has been brought to my attention that I actually DO like an actual Bruce Cockburn song that is actually sung by Bruce Cockburn.


But I am a big enough squirrel_e_girl to admit it.

It's a really good song. It's sweet and happy and up-tempo.

It is written and performed by Bruce Cockburn.

And, I like it.

Here it is:

...I still hate the other Bruce Cockburn songs.

So there!!

If I was a betting squirrel....

There are 4 ice cream sandwiches in the freezer.

I am home alone for the next 20ish hours.

What are the chances of there being any ice cream sandwiches left in the freezer by this time tomorrow??


Scratch that.

There are 3 ice cream sandwiches in the freezer.

I am home alone for the next 20ish hours.

What are the chances of there being any ice cream sandwiches left in the freezer by this time tomorrow??