Sunday, October 14, 2012

Beware, Fellow Bloggers!!!

Greetings, Other People Who Blog!!

In spite of what I may have advised in my last post...

Do NOT!!

let me repeat that..

Do NOT!!! pretty fall-type pictures in order to boost your Pageview count!!

Or, at least don't post them and then brag, for all the world to hear, about how the pumpkins and mums acted as catalysts for an unprecedented surge in your blog's Pageview stats.

For if you do...


Could very well happen to you!!
(this is a table cut and pasted from my blog's Stat page)

Pageviews today
Pageviews yesterday
Pageviews last month
Pageviews all time history
Don't track your own pageviews


Heartbreaking, isn't it??

For those of you to whom the tragedy of that table is not sadly obvious...

My Pageview count was wiped out.

I used to have a whole lot more than 1 piddly single solitary Pageview in my "all time history".

It's like I never existed.

I have no idea why....


Maybe it was wiped out as a warning.

...An ominous threat.

Kinda like finding a horse head on my pillow...

...but different.

Maybe someone important at Google was afraid that if word got out about the "Pumpkins & Mums Effect", all the blogs here on Blogger would be inundated with mobs and mobs of weenies looking at pretty fall-ish photos and the whole Blogspot system would crash...


Even more cataclysmic...

...Maybe they feared that, ultimately, Google itself would be overwhelmed by pumpkin and mum lovers and it would crash...

...and the world as we know it would come grinding to a Google-less halt.


I guess I can live with starting over with my Stats if it means saving the world.

You're welcome.


....well, I have to start building my Pageview count back up again, don't I?

p.p.s. In case anyone was wondering, the lone pagview came from Russia. Russians dig me. As I've mentioned before, I am to Russia what The Hoff is to Germany.

p.p.p.s. Upon further scrutiny, the calculations of the Pageview table seem to be a bit suspect. If they counted 1 pageview "last month" and 1 pageview "today" wouldn't that be 2 pageviews in "all time history'? and not just 1?? I know I'm an English major but even I can figure out that 1+1=2. Usually.



Linda B said...

I could read your blog all day, but I must go to work now. Awesome as usual.

Laura said...

Hmmmm... I seem to remember another blogger talking about this very thing a month or so back. She was quite upset that her pageviews had been cleared out. If I recall correctly, it took about a week (perhaps less), to work itself all out.

See. That's what you get for bragging.

P.S. If you are REALLY serious about boosting your #'s, I suggest you write things like "Titty" or "Wide ass" into your titles or blog posts. It's surprising how many dirty eff's from India etc (probably Russia too), google that stuff!

LisaAnn said...

Hahaha, love it! People from the Middle East seem to dig me, and the most popular search is something gross about love and humans and animals. Yikes.

squirrel_e_girl said...

Thanks, All!!

The newest addition to my "Key Search Word" table..."naked girl on Maury" .... Class-E!!

LisaAnn said...

P.S.- Thank you so much for your sweet comment on my Two Roads Diverged post.