Musings From the Squirrel Cage: Happy Birthday, Spencer!! ...yeah...ummm...sorry 'bout that.

I had the craziest dream last night...actually it was at 4am so I guess that counts as this morning...

~A Warning...This post is about a dream I had and my dog...to clarify, it is not about a dream about my dog...so if you are one of those people who hates listening to other people describe their dreams or if you are one of those people who hates listening to other people talk about their dogs, this post is not for you.~

So, I was in the middle of this crazy super vivid dream...I could recount it in minute detail...but I won't ... but I will give you the basics:

So, Me and two friends ...Ron and Hermione maybe ?? ... are frantically trying to lock our apartment in order to keep out a very vicious vampire who is hell-bent on getting me. We manage to get all the main floor windows and doors suitably sealed but for whatever reason, we neglect to lock the window on the upper level...FOOLS!!

Same thing happened to me in the only zombie dream I've ever had...In that particular dream, I had assumed...rather wrongly... that zombies couldn't climb and so hadn't bothered with securing the upstairs windows. Apparently they can climb...the tricky bastards)

So, I catch a glimpse of the vampire scaling the fire-escape.

I ask you...what self-respecting vampire uses the fire-escape?? Really, he should've just zipped up the wall relying on his inhumanly strong finger tips and vampirey super speed to propel him...but I digress...weird.

So, I immediately gather Ron and Hermione into a room that has wrapped Christmas presents covering the floor...of course it does... and using some deep breathing techniques and a couple of magic words, I make the three of us invisible.

Invisibility cloaks are for pussies.

So, a split second after the three of us cease being see-able, the vampire calmly opens the door and is rather surprised to find it empty...other than, of course, the plethora of Christmas prezzies...Ron and Hermione get all fool-hardily cocky and start jumping up and down right in front of the vampire taunting him...I guess they were more than just invisible...obviously my dreamy magic is very powerful. Except that trying to keep them safe through all their antics must've drained my own protection and the vampire sees me and lunges at me. He trips over some of the presents but manages to grab hold of one of my feet. In an effort to rid myself of this nasty vampire who has glommed onto my leg, I lift up my non-glommed on leg and with all the adrenaline-fuelled anti-vampire strength I can muster and a Braveheart-worthy battle cry, drive my heel right into the vampire's face...

Only it isn't the vampire's face...

I actually drove my heel, with all the dreamy adrenaline fuelled anti-vampire strength I could muster and a Braveheart-worthy battle cry...

...right into my poor dog's ribcage.

I was awake as soon as my foot connected with Spencer's side and just as he yelped in pain-fuelled surprise, I gathered him up in my arms and apologized like crazy, but he was having none of that and bounded off the bed. He wandered around the bedroom grumbling for a minute before he gave in to my pleas for him to come back for a make-up snuggle.

I had to apologize with special fervour since today is his birthday and what a way to start his 7th year of life.

Poor fella.

I quickly debriefed my startled and not very awake Guy who wasn't sure what all the yelling had been about and then he conked out again.

Deciding to forgive and forget, Spencer curled up right beside me and fell fast asleep. Dogs are good that way.

I was feeling a little less guilty and was falling asleep myself when ...

...he farted.

...pretty much right in my face.

I guess I deserved it.

Forgiven...but not forgotten.